Writing My Research Paper

My ONE and ONLY goal today was to write a six page research paper. Here is how my day shaped up:

7:30-8:30: Go to yoga so I can get my workout out of the way and start FOCUSING. Get coffee on the way home to help with the FOCUSING.

8:30-10:00: Play with the dogs. Eat breakfast. Make some popcorn. Eat the popcorn. Crave something sweet. Search for something sweet in the house. Darn, we stopped buying sweet things. Stumble upon bitter sweet chocolate in the back of the cabinet. Ok, time to start FOCUSING.

10:00-10:05: Read the prompt for the paper. Sit in silence for a couple minutes, staring at the fish tank. Nope, can’t think of anything inspiring to write about.

10:05-11:30: Take a ‘step away from writing for a moment’ aka lay on the couch. What appears as a nap is actually me trying to dream up a thesis statements.

11:30-12:30: Wake up from ‘thesis statement dream’. Take a shower. Eat leftovers.

12:30-1:00: Make a list of all the stuff I want to get done before we go back to school. Check my blog stats. Check my Facebook. Check my InstaGram. Oh great, I haven’t hit my max of three allotted photos this week yet. Post picture. Refresh to see who liked/commented. Check my NeoPets?

1:00-4:00: Meet Peter to “talk about my paper”/Victorian lit/teaching/my grad project/life.

4:00-5:00: Decide to make dinner. Go to grocery store for supplies. Get caught up in candy aisle. FOCUSING? What does that word even mean?

5:00-5:05: Get home. Start up computer. Re-read prompt. Stare, again, at the fish tank. Nope, still no ideas.

5:05-7:00: Start making dinner. Oh, I want to bake cookies too. Play with the dogs. Bug my sister (who is actually writing a paper). Eat dinner. Check my InstaGram. Perfect, four people liked my picture. Eat cookies. Walk around the house. Sing some love songs. Ponder whether I should use tables or desks in my classroom next year. Tell stories about ‘The Elbert County Construction Zone’. Look at the chickens and ducks outside. Call dad. Call mom. Call Aunt? Consider cleaning my bathroom. Nah.

7:00-7:15: Lay on the couch for “15 minutes”

8:00-9:45: Oops, that turned into a 45 minute detour. Now it’s time to start FOCUSING. Write the paper.

9:45-11:00: Paper is only 4 pages long. Out of ideas. Text everyone I know and ask how they make their papers longer. Add more paragraph breaks. Change periods to size 14 font. Enlarge margins. Paper is now at minimal 6 page length. Perfect.

11:05: Submit paper.

Now, if only I could have done the FOCUSING earlier, I could have done something else with my day. Is anyone else’s writing process this lengthy?

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