How to Make Adult Friends

When you are growing up, its easy to make friends, because everyone you hang around is in a similar life stage; everyone is worried about passing their driver’s test, so your conversations can all stem around how to answer the questions on the test; everyone is applying for college, so your conversations can revolve around […]

To My Future Husband, This I Vow To Thee Today–

I believe singledom-hood is a very important and unique time in one’s life that should not be taken lightly, because it is when we are able to experiment the most with identity formation, without too many harsh consequences. It’s kind of like being in teaching school–because teaching requires so many in the moment judgements and […]

The Disadvantages of Being Single (Part II)

I entered single-hood three? four years? ago (hey, when you are at the end of your dating rope, these things kind of just run together). I wrote “The Disadvantages of Being Single” (which got an overwhelming response) at the beginning of this journey, and now that I’m a more seasoned veteran, I’d like to add […]

All the Love Advice I’ve Ever Read, Summed Up in One Post.

I see these headlines all over the place: “How to Make Him Want You”, “10 Easy Steps to Be Irresistible”, “How to Tell If He Likes You”…I just read one, “22 Qualities Guys Look For in Woman that Will Make Him Stay”, and it basically outlined all these really vague things–“be honest”, “be supportive”, “if […]

The Trait of Selfishness

Lawrence Kohlberg’s Stages of Moral Development breaks down the intentions behind our actions into three basic stages: Pre-Conventional, Conventional, and Post-Conventional. In the Pre-Conventional stages, we are motivated by rewards and by avoiding punishment; I pick up my litter, because I know if I don’t, my mom will yell at me, and then later, I […]

Along the Road Towards Love

I love hearing stories of how people met their significant others, and despite the fact that every story is very different and very unique to the couple, every story carries the same two threads: when you know, you know, and that timing, while we cannot always predict it, is always perfect. I’ve heard stories about […]

When You are at the End of Your Dating Rope…

The beginning stages of dating can be really fun. You don’t really know anything about yourself, so you think anything can work: “I could really like boys in bubblegum pink shirts, so let’s give this one a try”, “It could be possible that my Future Husband plays Dungeons and Dragons on the weekend”, “Maybe I’ll […]

Transits of Love

I’m adding a sixth book to my list of favorites: The Transit of Venus by Shirley Hazzard. The novel spans thirty years, and follows two sisters (Grace and Caro Bell) as they enter adult hood, the work force, marriage. The writing is poetic, and the narrative structure is a mix between traditional Victorian novel (love […]

New Dating Rules (Now That I’m 26)

According to statistics, now that I’m 26, I’m creeping closer to the national marrying age of 28, which means the game is changing, it’s time for me to start getting serious, so the rules must change as well: 1.Date with the intention of marriage: When I was 16, it was important to date someone who […]

Social Contracts Between Men & Women

We can blame the Victorian’s for their influence on social etiquette. There are two reasons we created “etiquette”, or rules to follow in social situations. For one, etiquette translates to status, and status translates to power. The more rules I know, the more refined I am, the more money my parents had to send me […]